Glow-In-The-Dark Scorpion Belt BuckleRegular price $33.00 Save $-33.00
It doesn't get more badass than this
Made of alloy metal and carved with Western designs, this unique belt buckle has a real scorpion embedded in it.
And did we mention the luminous center glows in the dark after being exposed to light?
You're welcome 🤟🏽
Fits on standard 1.5" snap-on belts
Size: 9 x 7 cm (3.54 x 2.76 in.)
The Bullet BeltRegular price $55.00 Save $-55.00
Rock 'n reload
When you're shooting for that outlaw bandit look, it's time to rock this genuine leather belt that looks like a bandolier loaded with bullets.
It comes in four colors and three sizes, and is also studded with skull and crossbones, and a design featuring a gun in front of a row of bullets.
The buckle and bullets are metal alloy, and the belt is 3.8 cm (1.18 in.) wide.
Rock it and you'll never run out of ammo, or have to ask yourself "did I fire six shots or only five?"
Plays well with Bullet Boots.
Delivery: 2-4 weeks
This product ships to you directly from our overseas supplier
3 Megaton R7 Semyorka Nuclear MissileRegular price $3,298,735.11 Save $-3,298,735.11
You're guaranteed to have a blast
Have fun blowing shit up with this 3 megaton Soviet-era nuclear missile.
With a 5,000-mile range, you can destroy a city, small country, or your in-laws' entire world from the comfort of your own home. Or just blackmail governments for cash, cheese or hard-to-find bike parts.
• Intercontinental ballistic delivery system included.
• Dishwasher safe, allergy-free, environmentally tested.
• Honeytrap experience at KGB Strippers included with every purchase.
• See the blast radius and casualty estimates with this neat simulator (just enter 3000 in the kiloton yield).
Semyorka means "quality" in Russian
In the chaos that ensued the breakup of the USSR, a few of these puppies fell out the back of a truck and into our lap. Good times.
They come with a 2-day warranty, but you can also purchase a 15-year service plan (you're welcome).
We stand behind the quality of all our products. If it doesn't detonate then return it with proof of purchase. We'll replace it with the same warhead or another one of equal megatonage.
In case you need us to spell it out, no Virginia we're not actually selling a nuclear missile. This is a joke.
If you're rich, stupid and/or generous enough to buy this then you're responsible for any transactional and other incidental costs associated with giving you your money back.
The other option is that you let us donate some or all of these monies to two charities we support—Biker Down and Association of Recovering Motorcyclists
Brought to you by:
Skull of Thine Enemy BowlRegular price $222.00 Save $-222.00
Viking SkullRegular price $555.00 Save $-555.00
Special Forces Carved SkullRegular price $333.00 Save $-333.00
Special Forces are as badass as it gets. And a skull is as badass as it is. We put the two together to make this carved skull, a beast of craftsmanship.
Exorcist Skull MaskRegular price $399.00 Save $-399.00
Carving time: 125 hours
Big Bag 'O PooRegular price $111.11 Save $-111.11
We all gotta duck when the shit hits the fan
A MYRIAD OF USES
- Improve survivability during a pandemic by keeping people away.
- Explosives for militant animal rights protests.
- Sell on coprophilia kink sites for a handsome profit.
- Send chocolate-covered poo bites to your nemesis.
- Discourage police from searching your smelly car when you're transporting controlled substances.
- Confuse drug detection dogs—we recommend our specialty Bitch-In-Heat Poo (currently half off).
- Place in front of neighbor's door in paper bag, set fire, ring doorbell and run away—repeat until shot or disfigured by a Doberman.
- Hide poo in a snowball or mudpie and throw it at someone much larger than you.
- Gift wrap it, label it Winnie The Poo's Poo, and give it to a deserving child.
- Throw it at your nemeses.
- Throw it at a biker (R.I.P.).
- Throw it at your mama naked.
- Throw it at a chimp (who threw poo at your granmama first).
- Create an Amazon listing for a glitter bomb—then send it with exploding poo instead of glitter.
For a chance to win a Big Bag 'O Poo
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100% ETHICALLY & ORGANICALLY SOURCED
We harvest our poo straight from the source—our two prodigious poop-makin' producers Daizy and Bandit.
"This Bag 'O Poo is 100% organic and made of the best money can buy. You get it straight from the source: our dogs' anuses.
We guarantee this product is 100% full of shit. If you find better shit elsewhere, then tough shit on us"
- Deme Spy, CEO